This age-long question has its answer imprinted onto the sands of time but we all feel too scared to admit it sometimes. In history, several undocumented marriages have occurred between a man and a woman older than him. Everyone has just been too busy to document.
There are still quite a few examples of men in this generation, who married a woman older than them. Emmanuel Macron, a French politician and one-time President of France is happily married to an older woman. Nick Jonas and Priyanka Chopra (the beautiful Indian actress) are beautifully living life together. Gerald Pique, the Spanish footballer, is not regretting getting married to Shakira, the beautiful Colombian singer. How about Jason Mamoa of Aquaman and Lisa Bonnet? These couples have around 9-to-25 years gap between them with the woman as the older partner.
While there may not be any legislation against a man marrying an older woman, we all naturally expect the male partner to be older. There are reasons why this is generally expected, you will see these reasons here. But if you decide to opt-in to marry a woman older than you as a man, or marry a man younger than you as a woman, are there some benefits the relationship should expect?
You may also find out if the pros of marrying an older woman can perfectly balance out, so that age difference can totally be removed as a criterion for choosing a marital partner. However once again, there are pros and cons to these things.
Pros/Advantages of Marrying an Older Woman
Shortly here, we will see the pros of marrying an older woman. Most of these you will be able to relate with.
1. She is more mature and homely
Older women are reputable for being more homely and receptive. Sometimes, she might understand life better than you but she is submissive enough to bring home her wisdom. She is cool-headed and mature, even more than the young girls who do not yet understand much about life.
It can be likened to a situation where the older beauty treats her younger man as she would treat her own son while still respecting him as her husband. What a blend of two whole worlds!
2. She is more self-sustaining
Many older women who consent to a marriage with a younger man have a lot to bring to the table. Some of them may have achieved wealth by themselves over the years. This means that she is more self-sustainable and socially accomplished, and lesser pressure on the man thereafter.
While the companionship remains, coupled with a regular bedtime activity, which she is also very good at, she feels fulfilled, and would not hesitate to make your life happier as well.
3. She understands life really well
Many issues in marriage arise from the lack of understanding about life in one or both partners. These issues can be circumvented when your partner understands life a little better. Pivotal issues of marriage like sex and its importance, submission to the dynamics of family leadership, and so on, will become a thing of the past if you have a woman who understands these as much as you do.
Through her experiences in life and from past relationships, she knows so much about marriage to make you have the greatest time for the rest of your life. She does not try to force you to dance to her tune, and nor does she think she can hop from one marriage to another anymore. She understands your needs and acts to satisfy them.
4. She accepts your flaws as a man
While many women focus on the flaws of men, a good woman focuses on her strengths. The one lesson age and experience teach older women is that they learn to accept you for who you are, and not judge you unnecessarily. This ensures her own peace of mind and also facilitates the trust to keep the union bubbling upwards only.
With this understanding, older women would ignore news about you having affairs and would not consider a need to stress over them whether they are true or not. And if the news did turn out to be true, she would choose to keep it discreet rather than making it a public show as younger women might do.
While that is not to advocate for infidelity, the mere fact that she trusts you enough to handle life more maturely with you should prompt you to give her the same respect she deserves and avoid cheating.
5. She understands sex better
In a survey conducted by Today.com, nine men expressed their sexual preference for older women. One of them named Zach (26) said “Sex with an older woman is like an intense marathon”. Gary (39) said “An older woman knows exactly what she wants and how to communicate it. Russ (29) and Scott (25) also supported that the fact that older women know what they need and desired during sex makes it a whole lot easier to please and satisfy yourself too. (All ages were reported at the time of the survey).
To crown it up, Benjamin Franklin, on marrying an older woman, wrote an open letter to an anonymous friend in 1745, stating about older women;
“They have more knowledge of the world, and their minds are better stored with observations, their conversation is more improving and lastingly agreeable. When women cease to be handsome, they study to be good. To maintain their influence over men, they supply a diminution of beauty by an augmentation of utility. They learn to do a-1000 services small and great and are the most tender and useful of all friends when you are sick. Thus, they continue amiable. And hence there is hardly such a thing to be found as an old woman who is not a good woman. There is no hazard of children, which irregularly produced may be attended with much inconvenience. Through more experience, they are more prudent and discreet in conducting an intrigue to prevent suspicion. The commerce with them is, therefore, safer with regard to your reputation. And with regards to theirs, if the affair should happen to be known, considerate people might be rather inclined to excuse an old woman who would kindly take care of a young man, form his manners by her good counsels, and prevent his ruining his health and fortune among mercenary prostitutes. In every animal that walks upright, the deficiency of the fluids that fill the muscles appears first in the highest part: the face first grows lank and wrinkled; then the neck; then the breast and arms; the lower parts continuing to the last as plump as ever: So that covering all above with a basket, and regarding only what is below the girdle, it is impossible of two women to know an old from a young one. And as in the dark, all cats are grey, the pleasure of corporal enjoyment with an old woman is at least equal, and frequently superior, every knack being by practice capable of improvement. The sin is less. The debauching of a virgin may be her ruin and make her life unhappy. The compunction is less. The having made a young girl miserable may give you frequent bitter reflections; none of which can attend the making an old woman happy.”
Final words
Marrying an older woman has its own advantages and disadvantages but that’s not strange. There is hardly anything in the world that has advantages without disadvantages, not even a marriage with a younger woman. And while the world is favourably disposed towards marriage between a man and a younger woman, there is yet no legislation or contraindication to marrying an older woman.
With good understanding of each other, you can have a sweet marriage with a woman older than you. So, if she so appeals to you, and you can make an informed decision based on all the considerations stated in this post. I hope that in the end, you find true love and happiness, now and ever after.